I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize