Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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