One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
