David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
