Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Randomize
