We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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