i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
