Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
