Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize
