Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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