im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
God, I missed his penis.
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