So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
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