just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
The air was thick with penises
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
