Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Semen is not good for contacts.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize