u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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