ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
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