I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Randomize
