their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
