it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
