this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
he puts the penis in happiness.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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