I hate all girls vehemently.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
