I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize
