so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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