Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
