"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
