That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
