Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
