I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Randomize
