love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Randomize
