Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
