D3 body, D1 cock
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
