I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
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