so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
