there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Randomize
