talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
