I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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