Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I won't apologize to a one balled man
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize