Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
