"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
