Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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