It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize