covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
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