So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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