So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
