: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
third nipple confirmed
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
