You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
