fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize