Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
