some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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