Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
